The Legend Of Shizuo
by Seliphra
Summary: Shizuo is sent on an epic quest to defeat the king of trolls...summary and warnings inside. For IcyWarm


**I dedicate this fic to IcyWarm who apparently requested it on Kink Meme, however I can't find where she requested it on there to post it there as well, so deal with it here.**

**Summery: Shizuo has been sent on an epic quest to save children and the world of Ikebukuro from the troll king, Ganadorf-Mikado and his eavil henchmen, Anri, leader of the Saika Trolls and Kida, Leader of the Yellow Scarf Trolls. With the help of a renegade troll named Izaya he may yet free the princess Celty from her confines in her castle and save the world of Ikebukuro from being forever cloaked in twilight...and put off the troll invasion until the invention of the internet. **

**Warnings: Complete crack, total randomness, really bad following of _The Legend of Zelda, Twilight Princess_ storyline, OOCness TO THE MAX, damage to the fourth wall, language, violence. No pairings. **

**Dislcaimer: I don't own the rights to Durarara or the rights to any of the legend of Zelda games...though I do own copies of the games...they are teh fun.**

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><p>Shizuo sighed as he put his horse away and patted her side gently. Another hard day's work done at least.<br>"Oh, Shizuo! There you are!"  
>"Eh? Tom! What are doing here?" Shizuo smiled at the man who chuckled.<br>"The mayor wants to send you to the capital with the gift for the royal family,"  
>"Makes sense, I'm the only one with a horse…" He smiled and patted his trusty Kasuka's side.<p>

"Yeah, you'll be heading out in the morning, rest up before then!" Shizuo nodded at the sword master.  
>"Yeah, I'll be by later to pick it up," He agreed before climbing up the ladder that led up the tree and into his house. He was not to sleep yet though as the other village kids came to him.<p>

"Shizu! SHIZU!"  
>"Don't call me that Erika! What do you want?"<br>"Come here! Come on!" He rolled his eyes and headed down the ladder again.  
>"Hmm?"<br>"Teach us to fight with swords!" All four demanded and he shook his head.  
>"Why?"<br>"Because…"  
>"…What? I have to wake up tomorrow! Vorona! Hey!" Vorona accidentally-on-purpose let Kasuka loose and the mare took off. Yeah, seems we miscounted earlier, it was five kiddies. He knew Kasuka was a guy's name, but he'd always liked the name so his horse got it. Problem?<p>

"Oops…" She tilted her head to one side and Shizuo started after Kasuka. The others all followed him as he chased his mare down….except they found some weird wall there.  
>"What the?" Suddenly everything was all twilight because that is how the story goes and yes, they all knew it was strange…and they pitied the author, she tries damn it! So as things go and in order to progress this any further the children were whisked away by creepy…things and Shizuo felt himself shiver and shudder before he passed out cold.<p>

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><p>"Oh~? Are you awake yet~?" What an annoying voice! Shizuo growled and lifted his head now to look for the source when he saw something he had never seen before.<br>"Ah! You are! Excellent~! Oh but look…you're stuck!" Shizuo growled and looked down at his paws….wait…paws? Yes. Because anyone who has played Twilight Princess knows that Link becomes a big wolf. So Shizu-chan must now become one too….but he's gold.

"I can get you out….for a price~" Shizuo glared at the speaker. He wasn't big…he looked like he was wearing a coat too with fur trimming…not that he needed it if he was indeed male because his legs stuck out entirely and ended in odd little points. His skin was black, but his eyes were red…and were those horns? Yes.

"I'm Izaya….but you may call me master," Shizuo snapped and growled more before trying to lunge at him, but his paw was indeed trapped by a big metal cuff.  
>"Oh~! Kowaii, kowaii! I won't help bad monsters escape~! No I won't!" Shizuo growled more but then huffed and sat down, opting to glare at this…thing.<p>

"Better. I can see you're wondering what I am, so I will tell you. I am a troll. We trolls live in twilight, and we want to join your world so we can live under your bridges and take your gold…except the plan went horribly awry! Instead of being able to steal your gold the people all turned into little ghosts but the king of the trolls doesn't seem too upset about this. He's content to just let everything go like this and live in your houses instead of under your bridges like we trolls were meant to do. I mean one day we'll be attractive and use the internet, but for now we look like black chibi things and live under bridges."

Shizuo yawned. This thing spoke too much. Troll huh? More like a flea. The flea-troll moved right through the bars and swatted him on the nose.  
>"Bad wolfie! You're my pet now, y'here~? I'm going to help you, but you're going to help me beat the king of trolls, he will never be my king you see, for I am far better at trolling then he is." The flea snapped the chain around his leg then and Shizuo snapped, trying hard to take a bight out of him.<p>

"Oi! Nope~! I will eat your horse if you do that again! Besides, your friends all got kidnapped, so now we must go save them…and usurp the troll King Ganondorf-Mikado in the process…Oh! But watch out for his two henchmen! Anri and Kida are scary trolls too! One is the head of the 'Yellow Scarves' division. They are yellow and they wear scarves!" Shizuo rolled his eyes at this. Things were just getting worse and worse….

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><p>Summary: Shizuo = Link, Izaya = Midna, Tom = Village swordsmaster, Van gang + Vorona = village children, Mikado = Ganondorf, Kida and Anri = bad guys under Ganondorf-Mikado, Celty = Princess Zelda, Kasuka = A Horse. We don't know what other characters will be appearing as yet, but yeah. Send suggestions.<p>

**_REVIEW!_ I can not tell you how frustrating it is to see ten favourites, ten alerts and NO reviews. What did you like? What didn't you like? Did you like it at all? Do you even exist? _If you do not review we authors don't know you're really there!_ I need reviews! I live on them! I thrive on them! So review! Please! I honestly don't care if all you write is "Review." I don't care if all you say is "Good, please update soon" I really don't! I just want to see the review exist. That is all. It takes only a few seconds to leave one, and they really do help! If you found something wrong though, don't just say 'bad' or 'it sux' tell me what you didn't like and why! Then I can fix it and improve, because if all you do is say 'your formatting sucks' there is nothing I can do! If you do say just 'bad' then have some balls. Don't leave it anonymously because if it's anonymous I can't reply and ask what you thought was bad or tell you the definition of a paragraph which some people still don't know and then go around and flame people! Now then. Long authors note is long. Long authors note is over now too. Author apologises for the rant, but she had no choice.**


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